This weekend the New York Times published this article about stylists being summoned to hospital rooms after women give birth. Apparently bookings are on the rise for those gorgeous just gave birth shots. This is something I’ve totally seen with celebrities and wasn’t really surprised when I read the piece. I’ve always oohed and awwwed at the flawless natural makeup with that perfect bun, gleaming blissfully after pushing out their little watermelon. Those pictures are beyond beautiful and always make me think…”How on Earth does she look that good?!” I always assumed but never knew there was a glam squad involved.
Who cares about the 30 hours of labor, the failed epidural, and the blood bath beneath you on the delivery table right?!
It’s a growing trend and I get it. Why shouldn’t you want to look your best when you present your new little one to the world?! Why wouldn’t you want a portrait of that epic moment when your life changed forever that you are proud to share? A little pampering would be awesome after you know….giving birth!
Except here’s the thing, no one is looking just at you when they log on to Facebook or Instagram. They are looking at your adorable newborn baby too. They want to see that crinkled face wrapped snug in a swaddle, with those sleepy eyes barely open. They want to see how you really are, did you survive? Are you exhausted? Are you happy? Are you overwhelmed? Are you all of the above?
While I understand this need to look your best, this latest trend isn’t really my cup of tea. I’m sort of over the “look at my perfect life” pattern that’s happening on social media. We are all so quick to share the wonderful parts of our lives, but sometimes we forget to be real. To be honest. To show the tough moments in between.
And while I admire those photos when I see them, I’ll take my ragged, worn out, messy pictures any day.
You know the ones of me crying and exhausted after an emergency induction five weeks too soon. I couldn’t believe that I was actually a mom and was overwhelmed with gratitude when I met her.
Even if she was whisked away hours later to the NICU and we had to go home without her.
Or the one after baby number two where I’m so bloated and chubby like a chipmunk, so relieved for the pregnancy to finally be over. And so happy to know that she was healthy, full term, and could go home with us right away.
I didn’t care about my ugly hospital gown, if I had makeup on, or if my ugly nursing bra was showing….I just wanted to enjoy the moment as it was. Our moment. Our children. Our birth stories.
So if that’s your choice to document that moment with perfectly coiffed or blown out hair, a lovely outfit, and a flawless face, go for it! I’m sure it will be a lovely reminder of your journey into motherhood, and something most of us won’t have. But if you don’t – your pictures of the real you are just as beautiful. They are pure, they are true, and they will be treasured…as will you.
I completely agree with you! I think it is natural to want to always show your best side to the world, but sometimes those raw, real moments need to be just that. Always sugar-coating and beautifying everything is probably part of what is setting everyone up with unrealistic expectations of what life is really like.
yes Melissa and you said that beautifully! That’s the problem with the world today, we are creating unrealistic expectations for everyone! Thanks for reading!
I could not possibly agree more! This was excellent and you looked flawless in every picture! Not just because you and your babies are gorgeous, but also because they’re real!
I love this! First of all you look great and the pictures are beautiful. I honestly love my natural just in the moment pictures, it is just a reminder of the beautiful life you brought into the world.
Completely agree with you! After 26 hours of labor and my mind on breastfeeding, the way I looked was the last thing on my mind. Being a new mom was what was important to me. Glad to see that there are still non-vein woman in this world. Media (& social media) really does a number on our society! Thanks for sharing and inspiring everyday woman!!
Awwww thank you for reading!
I love this sooooo much! There was definitely no glam squad for me and I couldn’t care less. All I cared about was my baby being healthy! Both times!
I could have written this; you captured my feelings perfectly. I adore your real pictures. The one of you crying made me tear up.
I love this Kristen! And I ;personally think you look beautiful in your photo’s and see your new mommy glow!
After my first son I looked like swollen and run over bu a truck after 17 hours of labor and an emergency c section. I was puffy from the pitocin and fluids. I was surely not holly wood photo ready.
You are right! No one is looking at us, just the beautiful creatures we create!
Yes, to all of this! I personally, would not have wanted a ‘glam squad’ with me before, during, or after giving birth. It was such a personal time for me and my husband…and we were focused on our boys…not on how we looked. It seems self involved to have those kinds of photos taken…it’s not real life, and who are the photos for anyway?
For some peeps it’s about appearances, glad to know that for so many it isn’t!
The farthest thing from my mind was how I looked after delivering my girls! You are spot on with this post – no one is looking at us, just are newest addition. The natural, in-the-moment kind of shots are the ones I cherish from those days, regardless how bloated, fat & full on cry-face they may be! & you look freakin’ fabulous in all these shots – even more testament to skip the glam!
Right? But I get it – I do! And totally don’t want to judge moms that do this – it’s just for me the moments are what mattered most!
Oh my goodness what sweet photos! I gave birth once in a lovely cattle town in Montana. If I had brought in a glam squad I think the police would have been called!
Oh my goodness! I need to read that birth story! Not in a barn though right?!
No barn. It seriously was the best birth ever. Just me and doting nurses and a great family doctor. I had the best rest. They only brought the baby to me to nurse and then said we will hold him (literally) until you and he need some time together. I didn’t want to leave after my 3 days were up!
Amen! I don’t’ get it. After all my deliveries (C-sections), I was to wiped out to give a frig what I look like. And love looking life warrior in those hospital photos – because I was!
Oh, but I did get my nails done:)!
Good for you! Do it!
for the record, you look super cute. i almost think u secretly brought in a glam squad but won’t tell us!!! ;0
kidding.
and people who use social media to talk about how perfect their lives are drive me bonkers!
I love how you point out that those pictures are really more about the baby. I certainly didn’t have a glam squad after my deliveries, and I’ve never looked at and said, “Ugh. I look terrible.” Even though I kind of did. But that moment wasn’t about that. Those photos mark the most important times in my life, and they aren’t any less important because I’m bloated and tired.
I can’t imagine calling in a glam squad for photos. While I love to be dolled up, I think my parents and in-laws would have been insulted that my beautician saw the baby before them.
My pictures are crazy hideous, but I never cared either.. I loved all those moments. I never even thought of calling in a glam squad, but I will say that having someone come and give me a blowout would have made me very very happy. Washing and drying your hair after a csection is no joke…
I’m a big fan of natural beauty, and you have a ton of that! Your hair and skin glow in these photos. Your smile is gorgeous. But that’s because what’s inside of you – LOVE. Relief. And more love.
So from their standpoint when I was in the hospital, yeah, I probably wasn’t looking too hot. I still embrace those photos all the time because.. I did it! I really did it. Messy hair and all!
You look so beautiful in your photos! Mine looked like I had been to hell and back 😉
Great post, I’m sure everyone has their take on this and to each their own…now I’m inspired to share my story and how/why I “glammed” myself up the second time around!
Is this really a trend? I definitely don’t have any lovely pictures with makeup and perfect hair (how about greasy hair and a bloody needle stuck in my hand?). Just like you, I’ll be happiest as long as baby is full-term and can come home with us. Though I just may put in my contacts and a bit of translucent powder before pictures are snapped for this next one. (Don’t hate me!)