It comes every year, the anticipation and excitement of summer. For most that means loads of time swimming at the beach or pool to beat the extremely hot and humid weather. We are lucky to have a pool in our backyard now, but the first three years of parenthood we lugged our stroller filled with snacks, cooler, diapers, toys, towels, sunscreen, and loads of other crap to the community pool.
I thought things would get much easier now that we have a pool just a few steps away, but it’s still a bit of work taking the kids swimming every day. Especially since one of the girls is a toddler and still can’t dress herself. So here are the 30 easy steps to taking your kids swimming.
30 steps to take your kids swimming
- Change the kids into their swimsuits.
- Ask them to go potty and hear choruses of, “I just went!”
- Put their hair up so it doesn’t get in their eyes. One of them particularly loathes when she gets hair in her eyes.
- Put sunscreen on child number one. Quickly get a wet washcloth to wipe sunscreen out of her eyes which inevitably happens. Oops! (Note to self, buy a sunscreen stick)
- Put sunscreen on second child a little more carefully.
- Struggle to open the pool gate and usually break a nail or the skin on my finger in the process.
- Gather pool toys, rafts, Barbie’s and Barbie pool, flotation devices, dive sticks, goggles, and pool noodles.
- Start swimming! Woo hoo!
- Less than ten minutes later the oldest yells….”Potty! I need to go potty right now!” She argues with me and wants to go in the grass. “Your dad lets you do what? No we go potty in the potty!”
- Dry her off and send her in the house shivering.
- Ask the younger child to practice her turn, kick and reach. Then spend ten minutes calming her down and patiently encouraging her to practice swimming. End up just dropping toddler in the pool and making her do her obligatory four practice exercises.
- Once the older child is back and playing happily with her sister, grab my Nook, put my head back and sit by the side of the pool basking in the sun. Finally feel the peace that is summer!
- Five minutes later hear child number two exclaim, “I need to go potty!”
- Debate quickly – do I want another dripping child in the house? Uh no. So I bring the toddler potty outside. At least they don’t pee in the pool right?! (That grass idea might not be so bad, not that I’ll actually admit that to my husband.)
- Give child number one a ride around the pool, and then play shark with her.
- Play the mermaid game with child number two. Then play it again with child number one.
- Think seriously about making a cocktail as I sit by the side of the pool and work on my tan – when I see child number one straddling the water jet.
- Remind her quietly to stop. She gets embarrassed then splashes me in the face.
- Put child number one in time out.
- Get the water balloons out and blow up and tie copious amounts of water balloons.
- Do a few experiments then let them have a water balloon fight.
- Pick up infinitesimal pieces of water balloons all over the pool deck with the help of the kids. It seriously is worth all the work though, they love it!
- Sit in the sun for a nice stretch and finally feel like I’m on vacation. Then I start hearing, “Mommy watch this!” and “Mommy look at me!” The phrase I loathe the most during the summer. Until….
- Hear choruses of, “I’m bored!” or “I’m cold!” and start the getting out process.
- Dry off the kids.
- Strip them out of their bathing suits and hang suits and the towels to dry.
- Help them get dressed.
- Bring in all the pool toys and put them away.
- Hear choruses of, “I’m hungry!” and find a suitable snack that won’t spoil dinner.
- Start dinner and rejoice that two more hours of the day are gone! It’s almost bedtime…
I know what you’re thinking….”She’s really complaining she has a pool in her backyard?!” And it is really awesome, but doing this everyday can get a bit cumbersome. Quite honestly swimming with the kids and being home every day with them after 1:00 really is a gift that I do enjoy. If only we had a pool heater for the winter. Nah…never mind…I’ll keep this a summer chore activity. Plus it really is sooooo much easier than driving over to the beach, don’t even get me started on that process…
what steps did I miss?
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And don’t miss the 30 Easy Steps to Take Your Kids to the Public Bathroom. It really is fun isn’t it?
Haha The sunscreen is the worst! My son is getting better at letting me put it on him. He usual ends up looking like a clown though because I just end up putting it on without rubbing it in. Oh well!
It should be much easier next year! The hardest part for me is cleaning and brushing the pool. This year it’s been a piece of cake to let them swim. My problem is that they want to swim all the time and we have other things that need to be done!
Sunscreen sticks are a gift from God! They’re sooo much easier! Going to the pool really is a chore, but I think you’re right that going to the beach is even worse. SO MUCH GEAR to bring! At least the kids are old enough now to help carry some of it!
LOL! Pool owner/parent problems! haha! I love to get mine in the water whenever possible, but seriously..it is WORK and planning and the “potty” issues are so fun, right?? I have a similar regimen to yours….you just gotta do what works!!!
Don’t worry about complaining…I get it. The Husband was trying to convince me to get a pool membership this summer and I had memories of trying to entertain two terrified children in the pool by myself last summer. At least the older one starts four weeks of near-daily swim lessons on Monday. Hope you all have a great weekend and a happy Father’s Day.
Yes I hear you! It IS work but it tires them out! And it’s fun once they actually can swim!
Yep, this is pretty much what happens every time and we go every day. Luckily the older 2 children can help get their younger sisters to the bathroom. It was really lovely though when the toddler pooped in her swim diaper 3 minutes after we got to the pool.yesterday………..
Great summer tips. I will be sure to share.
This is hilarious! Even with one kid..
I remember taking Scarlet to a hot springs resort in California and she pooped through her swim diaper and through her suit, and thankfully, not in the gorgeous springs.
I nearly lost it that day. I haven’t been back since…
I wish we had a pool. I remember the days as a teen laying on a raft in the deep end suntanning. Pools = summer fun. Now with a kid we seldom go to the pool. I just enrolled my son in lessons a few months ago and wish we had a pool in the backyard so we could practice. We have the beach nearby, which we love, but we seldom swim in the Long Island Sound.
I stopped reading at number 12… I would never take my eyes off the kids in the pool..
It’s satire.